Woman Chokes Out Boyfriend For Singing Macklemore’s ‘Thrift Shop’ Repeatedly

vicemag:

Cry-Baby of the Week

The incident: A woman’s boyfriend wouldn’t stop singing the song “Thrift Shop” by Macklemore.

The appropriate response: Finding a boyfriend who is less lame.

The actual response: She attacked him. 

Last Saturday, Samantha Malson (pictured above) spent the evening out drinking with her boyfriend Lars, to celebrate his 26th birthday. 

According to Samantha, they’d spent a lot of the evening arguing because Lars had accused her of “consuming all the alcohol in the house.” 

At some point during the evening, Lars put on “Thrift Shop” (ugh, this just sounds like the worst birthday ever).

In a statement to police, Samantha said that, once the song was over, Lars continued to sing the lyrics “over and over” and that she asked him to stop “25 times.”

Enraged, Samantha started to shove Lars, but he still wouldn’t stop singing the song. So she grabbed him by the throat and started to choke him (wait, now it’s the worst birthday ever).

This is when Samantha decided to call the police. Which is weird, because she was the one commiting a crime. I can only assume that she was calling the police to tell them that Lars wouldn’t stop singing “Thrift Shop”? Oh dear. 

Unsurprisingly, they came and arrested her. And she was charged with domestic violence and harassment. 

Continue

(via slapmytitties)

ilovecharts:

States of Mind

by Jordan Marker

thedailywhat:

Witty Coffee Shop Sign of the Day

And the rest of the verse brought to you by beautiful folks on Reddit:

I got the Frappé patrol on the Latte patrol
Foes that wanna make sure my mocha’s cold
Starbucks barista that ask is it “hot or froze?”
I’m from Columbia stupid, what kinda grounds are those?
If you grew up with a phone in your hand, hello
You’d be celebrating the cookie that is actually dough

visual-poetry:

“please post no bills”

(found here)